Just a quick reminder of the two sets of Parish Planning Meetings – to look at our St. Ann community and determine contingency plans for staffing with a declining number of priests.
When: Tuesdays, Sept. 22 and 29, 7pm
or Sundays, Sept. 27 and Oct 4 – 12:15pm
Where: Parish Center
Why: To prioritize our top three options of how to staff St. Ann parish in the years to come…
PLEASE RSVP to Pat Marstall so we may prepare foryour presence – 314-385-5090
Finally, as promised, back to “Caregivers, Part III”
The next helpful step, we can work to regain “order” in our lives. A good place to start is to take steps toresolve all legal decisions regarding our loved ones, which will alleviate unnecessary stress and ideally help us in the future. Tasks such as ensuring that wills are up-to-date, naming a Power of Attorney, and establishing Medical Directives are concrete duties that help caregivers feel like they are more capable of managing the situation once completed.
It is also necessary to learn to let go, especially in areas where it is either not our job or where we have no control. Look at the situation realistically and determine what you are able to do and what you are not able to do. Learning to set limits and boundaries is a vital part of self-care. In order to develop healthy boundaries, we need to start learning how to be emotionally honest with ourselves, start owning our feelings, and communicate in a direct and honest manner. Once we are able to hear our own voices, our decisions will generally be what is best for our loved one and best for usin the long run.
All of these things are easier said than done. During these difficult times, it is important for caregivers to practice good self-care and focus on the bottom line – planning for our loved ones’ care and future. Therapy is a wonderful way to…work through feelings of anxiety, frustration, uncertainty, and fear that we often experience as our loved ones age and decline. Mediation is another means to relieve the stress in this difficult situation. Mediators act as a neutral third party and can assist families in developing and agreeing upon a plan of care for their loved one. Therapists and mediators can provide support and guidance on how to navigate end-of-life tasks that caregivers face such as handling the demands of providing daily care, establishing and enforcing boundaries, exploring new responsibilities and roles within the family, and planning for the future.
Caring for a loved one is a demanding and often lonely experience. It is imperative for caregivers to reach out and accept support in order to continue providing quality care for the duration.