This summer is not going well.

My home computer decided to quit working the Sunday morning after UMSL’s graduation, back in May.    Since I needed to ‘read’ the information on the computer, especially my calendar – as I had not been able to sync that information to my phone (that was apparently part of the ‘dying process’) – I did what I have done before in similar situations.  I hooked the hard drive up to a working computer at the Newman Center.  Unfortunately, that computer decided that it did not like the extra work and IT decided to stop working as well.  Two computers down in 4 days time.

Last Thursday the computer on my car decided to send mixed messages to my number 2 and 3 cylinders, causing the engine misfire, and making the engine warning light flash.  The dealership is not completely sure why this happened (and of course, they could not duplicate this in the shop…) so they flipped the controls for 2 & 3 with 1 & 4 and said:  “Let’s see what happens.”  Though that course of action makes sense, it doesn’t exactly inspire confidence and hope…

The good news is that these are just things.  Cars can be fixed or replaced.  Computers grow old and eventually stop working, but you can back up the files to external hard drives.  So in the grand scheme of life, these are just annoyances.

“But they are MY annoyances” that petty little voice inside my head tells me.  And that is where the summer can go bad quickly, in that moment when I make the choice about how I am going to interpret the data.  It is never the obvious “God is out to get me” that undoes me/us.  Most of us know better.  It is the more dangerous and subtle – “Does anyone really care or really notice?” that winds up pushing you in ways that are less than healthy and healing.

But I am glad for that voice, because it is easily recognizable amidst the din and hubbub of the day.  Once I recognize its petulance, I can laugh and relax and remember that God is in charge.  And I am reminded that these ARE just things, like the flowers of the field that whither and fade.  I am just passing through.  All that matters about me is held lovingly in the arms of God.

So my summer is not going well.  Thank God for that.  It is another reminder of the things that really matter, and Jesus’ invitation to seek first and only Kingdom of God.  “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be…”